The early days of wedding planning are magical, aren’t they? You’ve announced your engagement, you’re on Pinterest every minute of the day pinning the season’s hottest gowns, and the sky's the limit.
But then you have to make decisions. And budget. And take into consideration the opinions of others. And the stress sets in.
But it doesn’t have to.
Keeping your planning stress to a minimum really just requires a perspective shift—and the realization that you, badass babe, have this all under control.
Want a one-way ticket to heartbreak? Plan a wedding you can’t afford.
It may not seem that aspirational, but it is truly sexy to be in control of your budget. You’ll feel more assured, more able to confidently make decisions, and you’ll be happier knowing you’ll emerge without debt.
So the first step to kicking your wedding stress to the curb? Decide on a budget.
Take into account only the funds that you can contribute yourselves and those given by your families or friends.
And if you suspect that your soon-to-be MIL’s donation will come with strings, you can always choose to decline. (In all likelihood, the extra cash won’t make up for the presence of too many cooks in the kitchen.)
Now, stick to your budget. If ever you feel tempted to go over budget or make an impulse purchase, remember: debt is not hot. Hot girls stick to their budgets. And you are a very hot girl.
Learn to Delegate
In the multi-stage, multi-month phases of wedding planning, you are the boss. (Well, you and your soon-to-be spouse!)
That means you shouldn’t feel afraid to delegate. No CEO does every single job themselves. You are the CEO of your wedding, and if your trusted friends or family offer to help—perhaps wrangling vendors or making favours—say yes.
You don’t have to do everything yourself. And delegating wedding jobs to the people you trust to come through for you will reduce your stress for the entire planning period.
Just remember to be the good kind of wedding CEO—who is thankful, respectful, and appreciative to everyone who so kindly offers to assist. After all, wedding CEOs that become demanding, rude, or ungrateful have another name: Bridezilla.
Take Time to Prepare
Preparation is key to wedding planning. You’re not just preparing for the wedding day, you’re also preparing for the preparing of the wedding day.
So break out your bullet journals, post-it notes, and highlighters, babes. Because Type-A wedding project management is also, you guessed it, some serious hot girl shit.
For example: you’ve booked your first appointment at LAUDAE to begin your search for your dream gown. Do you have your shoes? Your undergarments?
Wearing the right undergarments to your appointment means you’ll be able to most easily visualize how the gown will look on your big day.
This makes choosing your wedding dress a much easier task, as you’re not mentally having to remove a panty line or a bra strap as you decide.
And your shoes. You may not have selected your wedding shoes yet, but bringing a heel of comparable height is very important to imagine the silhouette of your gown. Going barefoot or in flats when you intend to wear a 3-inch heel can do a disservice to you, in all your wedding day beauty.
Going into the tasks of wedding planning prepared will make each of those tasks easier, and help you keep your stress to the minimum.
Trust Your Instincts
Two truth-bombs for you here. #1: making decisions is the hardest part of wedding planning. #2: comparison is truly the thief of joy.
As you begin putting down deposits, booking vendors, and ruling out colour schemes, you’ll probably feel a surge of wedding stress come on.
This is because you’re moving from the imaginary world of endless wedding possibility into a much more concrete—and expensive—reality. It’s very common for brides to start doubting themselves.
You’ll do yourself a favour by learning to trust your own instincts.
In the world of weddings, there is an endless amount of aspirational content out there for you to consume.
But here’s the deal. You know you best. You know your relationship. You know what you and your partner will love, and what will make your day special.
That is all that matters.
Your goal is to go to sleep on your wedding day feeling loved, in love, and seen. To feel like you totally expressed yourself and owned your wedding day.
The only way to reach that goal is to ignore the noise, take control, and trust your own instincts.
Stay Focused On You
One more truth-bomb for you.
All you need—need—to get married is you (in your dream dress), your spouse, and a marriage license.
All the noise can sometimes convince us that we desperately need pearl-encrusted invitations, or raw linen napkins with customized embroidery, or four foot not three foot floral centrepieces. But it simply isn’t true.
Decide, with your partner, what really matters to you. Then stick to your plan as a united front.
Whatever you do: don’t let anyone convince you that the intricacies or nuances of “typical” wedding planning takes precedence over what you want.
To recap: in wedding planning, moments of stress can (and probably will) seep in.
But sticking to your budget, preparing ahead of time, leaning on the people who love you for help, and staying focused on you and your spouse will help ensure this planning period is a beautiful, exciting time in your lives together.
You’ve got this! ❖